Food is my hobby. My past time. My love. The thought of devouring certain foods makes my mouth water, causes anxiousness, and ultimately drives my physical body to ingest countless calories, sugars, and fats every day. Except for this past week – the first of many to come.
That’s not to say I performed “perfectly” this week – I still slid in a bit of ice cream, a few bon bons, and a touch of chips and salsa – but my calorie count was down between 500 – 1,000 calories every day. (I have re-started using an app called Lose It to track my calories).
Here’s what I learned about myself this week when I paused, felt, and listened to what my soul was saying…
Habits – What’s clear is that staying on auto pilot just won’t cut it. Meaning the same places you go to probably won’t cut it. Or, if they do, the same items on the menu won’t. You have to consciously change your eating habits and that starts one meal at a time. Instead of the saucy chinese chicken I wanted, I opted for the baked salmon. My typical bread binge like I’m fattening up for winter? No, just a single piece will do. The candy I came out of the womb eating? Time to say goodbye.
Emotions – I recently saw a Red Lobster shrimp commercial and my mouth started watering like Pavlov’s latest experiment. I’ve had “rough” days at work and have binged when I got home (or treated myself to cookies or ice cream before even leaving work)! There are days where I get anxious and I immediately reach for the peanut butter and jelly and my personal time machine back to elementary school. Obviously, each time I do this, I’m choosing to substitute problem resolution with food – and that barrier between me and addressing my issues has now formed a muffin top barrier between me and them.
Great observations, but where does that leave me? It leaves me with a choice – a definitively conscious choice – I have to make every time I eat, every time I pick up food, even every time I think about food (thoughts lead to actions you know). Sometimes they’ll be good choices. Sometimes they won’t. When they aren’t, I won’t chastise myself for that bad decision (despite my desire for perfection or nothing). I’ll keep on pushing toward my 30 pound weight loss goal.